The Arms Race Report

Being an ex-Animal Farm and the fact he's gaining weight, loosing speed and unable to provide the kind of performance the Team requires of him, BObbie decided to divert the attentions from him and focus on the gears.

His results is simply astonishing.

Crap - like a serial killer, BObbie first tested his skill with the Crap on a Felt F2, Shitmano Dura Ace 7900 and Mavic Ksyrium SL Red edition.


BObbie (1st edition) - then he started the kak with a Time RXR Ulteam, Campagnolo Super Record and Vokrim Racing 1.


Super Model - BObbie honed his skill with a Cannondale CAAD 10, Ultegra 6700 and Mavic Aksium Race.


Panda - although he denies his intention, he's next with a LOOK 595 Ultra (found by the BObbie), Shitmano Dura Ace 7900 and  Vokrim Racing 3.


'Pa - not willing to be second to anything, answered with Specialized Tarmac S-Works SL3 (found by the BObbie), Sram Red and Vokrim Racing Lite (handed to by zie Lani).


Tubs - benefitted from 'Pa's upgrade by taking over the Karbona with Sram Force and Easton EA90 SL (found by the BObbie).

Stache - benefitted from the Tubs by inheriting the Fuji sumthing and sumthing and sum thing (definitely not found by the BObbie).

Pluggie - not willing to go all out but still upgraded his Pinarello FP6 and Shitmano Tiagra with a Soul deep section hand built wheel set.

Goat - since he already rides a super bike Scott Addict R1, Campagnolo Record and Zipp 404, zie Goat added a Ducati Factory 900, Campagnolo Veloce and Campagnolo Vento. He also upped zie BObbie by naming them the Black Sabbath and the Red Devil (all found by the BObbie).


Dev 1 - although she does not understand what an "Arms Race" is, but she inherited the hatred for BObbie from zie Goat and quickly jumped the BObbie with another Ducati Factory 900, Campagnolo Veloce and Ambrosio hand built wheel set so the BObbie couldn't get it (yep, all BObbie).

Lani (1st edition) - being the real lani, zie Lani cannot be outdone by all zies bling bling and have zie Goat throwing nick names around. He quickly adds a Scott Addict R2, Shitmano Ultegra 6700 and Mavic Ksyrium Elite and named it the Red Devil. Goat "dislikes" Lani on both Facebook and Twitter (although BObbie had nuthing to do with this, but you know he underlined it...).


BObbie (2nd edition) - keeping the fire burning, BObbie pours more fuel with 2011 Campagnolo Super Record and Shitmal.



Larry - he denied this violently, but on a training ride, he disappears for 5 minute and returned with his Raleigh's chainstay cracked. BObbie introduces him to a Giant Advanced SL (found by the BObbie), Shitmano Ultegra 6700 black edition (found by the Lani who refuses to let BObbie have all the fun) and Mavic Ksyrium SL.


Lani (2nd edition) - Lani who is feuding with the Goat and just to pee him off, added a Scott Foil 10, Sram Red Tour edition, Easton EC 90SL and named it the Black Sabbath. Goat banned Lani from his Facebook and dis-followed Lani on Twitter.


BObbie (3rd edition) - having way too much fun, BObbie dropped another bomb with Campagnolo Bora Ultra Two.


Lani (3rd edition) - enjoy the race as maach as the BObbie, introduced the LOOK 695 SR (all BObbie since Lani wanted to introduce the Doggie 2), Sram Red Black edition, Mavic SSC Cosmic Carbone Ultimate and called it the Real Black Sabbath. Goat faints on treadmill.


Ninja - couldn't take it no more and booked a consultation with BObbie (ed. note: we will follow this closely and report back).

Bladder - (across two oceans, Bladder who represent the biggest sport brand of the world is now working on his version of the Black Sabbath. Goat found out he cannot trademark "Black Sabbath").

Panda who showed off his LOOK a bit too maach at the townships and was asked away with it cries foul and insist he will not join the race again and comes with a Cannondale Super Six 3, Shitmano Ultegra 6700 and Mavic Ksyrium Elite. However, BObbie continues to receive missed calls and SMS about the Cannondale EVO from an unknown number 0800-save-the-Panda.


BObbie is still working on SF100WSD, 'Tall and BOmie. He feel incomplete and will not rest until he arms the whole team.

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