Mud!!! (BOlani Edition)
So the weather man said “BO” for the weekend, and a few “BO” member who know better replied by saying “Come say that on my wheel Biatch!” and rode on Saturday and Sunday anyways which both turned out to be awesome cycling days. Except for Boic who the Lord said will LERN for not contributing to the wealth of certain oil rich “Sand Monkey’s”. In turn Boic got pissed on by the Lord en-route to starting point of Sundays Ride. In his defence though he did check in with the 2nd best weather predictor after the Lord Himself at 6am this morning. The conversation went something like this….
Loic: “ I have clear skies and lightning on the horizon? What’s the weather saying on your side”
Waiman “Cool” (bear in mind I was still in bed, had not got up yet and did not know what T FAAK I was talking about…
Loic: “OK”
Se moer!, he got pissed on like a whore in a Golden Shower Orgie…..
None the less towards 7:30am it seemed to be clearing so Sean and I decided to cal Arnold and take our mountain bikes thru at least just to give Loic the look and shrug and say “Oh Well”
However when we got there the weather had cleared and it looked like a good days cycling ahead so off we went. Just a bit of background we had no idea WTF we were getting into or weather we were on the correct route, however after researching on the net a little it seemed like a good idea trying the route so called “Braamfontein Spruit” which is a stream that starts off at “Melville Koppies” and runs all the way through to Sunnignhill.
The route run’s directly parallel to the stream and as sceptical “Roadie” on Mountain bikes all I can say is WOW!!!!
The route is easy to find awesome to ride and a great workout without even knowing cause you so focused on staying on the path and the bike for that matter. The total route is 40km and the first 10km is easy for any beginner to try which brings you up to Randburg at Conrad drive. From there on it is extremely technical and as the website warns to stay in groups of 5 or more as there are a great deal of robberies that take place there. As we ventured through this section which is extremely technical by now we noticed a group of river monkey’s hanging about that seemed to live around there and looked a bit suspicious, but hey we are team “BO” we aint scared of nothing, so we turn our bikes around and pedalled our asses so fast out of there.
As mentioned this section is extremely technical and my Bra’s were in such a hurry to get out of there that I found myself running next to my bike just so I would not see my P$@#s again.
Up to this point Shaun had seen his P$@#$S twice, Waiman/Ethan twice, Arnie once and Boic VOKOL!!!!. Ethan by now was a little stressed that we were gonna take another tumble anytime soon so Uncle Shaun did the good deed and started entertaining him by popping wheelies along the riverside during a semi flat stretch and Wallah… Uncle Shaun saw is P$%@S for a third time and this time flat on his back still attached to the bike.
Ethan’s jaw dropped not knowing if he should cry in pain for Laugh in Pain!!! We naturally did the BO thing and setting the example to Ethan said “Baba, you help him by laughing at him…. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA”
Anyway, I must say this was AWESOME fun and felt like an episode of Goonies wild adventures.
There are a couple of other routes around town so I encourage all you to beg, borrow or steal a mountain bike and join us on the next run.
The ride eventually ended back in Greenside and off course traditionally we did the honourable thing and sat down to some awesome Italian Sarmie, Cappuccino’s and finished it off with a Waffle with Italian Gelato Ice-cream.
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