The Arms Race Reports Back - The BObbie Strikes Back!

You cannot start if you cannot finish... And since Puncture BOb started, he has to end it. OK, so maybe this will just never end, still...

(Tubs swallowing Prozac...)

Anyway, BObbie receives a mystery box... It's not his fault that he barely trains, eat lots, have a double chin, can't see his piece, his toes, his toes... It must be the bike, the TIME is just too heavy (6.5kg heavy)... BObbie must reduce the weight if he wants to climb like zie Goatie...

EveryBOdy: (moron) How's about you stop ordering "Extra Large" everyTIME you are at Mickey D's?!!!

Anyway, BObbie needs light wheels. Nothing like a Campy BOra Ultra Two. No, they may not be fast like a Zippy, but it can hold BObbie's weight...

Campagnolo Super Record for smooth, precise, shifting. Yes, Shitram Red may shift more smoothly, but BObbie has fat fingers and what the eff is a double tap?!!! Seriously?!!! Tap twice to shift a gear?!!! What's wrong with just tap once?!!! Here at Campy when we tap twice, we move four gears. Yes, when you attack it works...

BObbie wanted titanium cranks, but they worried about his weight. No matter. Maybe Lani's EPS can shift faster, but this is plenty fast for BObbie. Besides, it doesn't slip. What's that? You say Shitram now has a chain catcher... OK... Anyway, BObbie has no idea why BB30 is better, but he has them...

Yes Goatie, the front wheel is also deep section. That's how you create a wind tunnel. What's that? You want control? Why don't you leave your Zippy at home then, wussie!

In case you didn't notice, it's a Bianchi. It may be made in Taiwan, but it is painted in Italy. Apparently according to the EU it counts... OK... Anyway, TIME for some Italian lessons.

Goatie: (translating) Reparto Corse means Racing DEPARTMENT. BObbie, zies is not for ju...

Goatie: (translating) Superleggera, it means Super light. BObbie, just because you have a super light on your bike doesn't mean you are not fat. Chubby face!

Goatie: (checking Google Translate) Over? Oh, oh, it means beyond as in BObbie you are beyond help fat BOy!

What's this? It gives BObbie wings?!!!

Lani: (snickers) What, you think you doing a Red Bull ad? You can drink a case and you won't fly Michelin Baby!!!

Lani also has one...

Yes, this is how you shift and brake... And yes, Shitmano just launched their 11 speed. So let's see. After both Campy & Shitmano now moves on with 11 speed and Electronic Shifting, the Shitram launches 2012 edition promising it fixed all their weaknesses and claims 11 speed and Electronic Shifting is just gimmicks... And you need two taps to change one gear... But they also have a chain catcher now...

Ultra thin seat stay... Basically Bianchi waits for everyBOdy to finish developing and then it adds in 1. massive down tube and BB area for power transfer, 2. BB30 since it seemed to work, 3. tapered head tube for extra stiffness, 4. ultra thin seat stay for comfort and 5. aero looks because your bike still counts for around 30% of the aero benefit even though BObbie is twice as large as the bike. Anyway, welcome to the modern world of carbon bikes...

Anyway, 6.2kg... Maybe BObbie can climb like the Goatie now...

(EveryBOdy doubts it...)

Anyway, BObbie wanna know should he get a celeste saddle or a black and white combination saddle? Please help the BObbie by voting...

Fizik Antare.

Fizik Arione

San Marco Regale Racing Team

Comments

loicbellet said…
goat correction: Reparto Corse = racing department. box in afrikaans.
6 June 2012 at 11:26
loicbellet said…
BOditor forgot to set up a vote for the saddle. anyway, option a is best.
6 June 2012 at 12:29
The BOditor said…
What a moron, racing department kinda don't relate to what i wanna say next!!!!

And next TIME ju wanna vote, come a bit earlier, the vote's finished. Option 4. Why is BObbie riding with a saddle wins!!!!

Idiot!
6 June 2012 at 13:32
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