Team B.O.

Viewers who are sensitive to poor grammar, spelling mistakes, inaccurate reporting, strong language, violence, nudity, sex should read this. At 05:00 the Bopa sms Lani to confirm that the ride is on. Bopa left his place at 06:20 and meet to Applicant, also known as BOtube, at 06:40. As usual on time and getting ready for the cold, wet and misty ride to Magalies, how bloody stupid are we to leave our warm beds to ride is such k@k weather. 06:50 I called Lani to check where's the rest of the team. As usual team BO is late. Arnold rocked up 07:05, not dressed as usual and holding up the rest of the team. The ride started off slow and at the mini Kruger hill, Lani and the goat wanted to show off and sprint to the top, leaving the rest behind, only for the goat to get a flat and LERN that you don't leave your mates behind.  At about 20km's Lani's glasses had to be "adjusted" and got left behind, even BOtube wanted to show off and chased after Goat and Arnold. As...

Whilst the rest of Team BO is closing down their racing season and begin to hibernate and eat lots, the Crap braved the mountains of the Far North. No thanks for the saturday ride. Ridden enough hours on the bike than I have probably in whole of last year. Day1 We rode slow but tried to ride in front of psycle maniacs. They did not like this so we let them go. We rode at last for probably 60km's where free pizza slowed down the psycle maniacs. We then passed about 20 teams including the psycle maniacs and finished 508 in at position 172. Goat (Pissed off): We didn't get no pizza!!! Bobbie: (Matter of factly): Whale & I beat BOmie and it's official. Day 2 On the advise of our neighbour telling us that we should be in a bunch at 25km as there is a 30km flat stretch, we formed a 10 man bunch after passing and being call race snakes and cycle guru's by psycle maniacs. We started a 50km\h pack but not being loved by jesus my teamie got a puncture while I was leadin...

Few announcements... Zie Editor, is kinda busy eating, since it's winter. So stop kakking him out for not updating zie Blog, ja? It's not like people actually read this kak, ja? Back in charge is zie Crap, conquering the Panorama. he will resume his "routine" training. You can now find him in all places that serves alcohol and you have to be over 21 to enter. Please also note that since the rumoured successful U.S. military mission to keep a fake promise years old by a lying leader, our long missing in action member BOliban is back with the team since he has no directives. Let's hope the rumour is true (hell, since this is the 6th accurate report) and he is back for real. Also hoping to be back, is the long lost Train. How he got lost on a railway we may never know... but between him & BOliban, we would never have to fear the wind again... Oh and we did find BOthemba, he's still white...

The Wilro, a 114km race that is flat but with sweeping wind everywhere. The race where the Goat thought he would kill of his teammies and instead, got wasted by the peloton and tossed out like a used condom. The race where BObbie thought he could hang with the Goat and was tossed as a condom 60km in the race. Regardless, this was not a very happy race for both. Lani still in deep remorse is still in BOwife’s arms. Pitt, still drunk is still in some girl’s arms (It was Katy’s, Katy’s!!!). Goat, Panda, BOpa and BObbie though, decided to use this opportunity to win the group at long distance as it is a goal for Team BO to be able to do so. The Applicants, not for one to miss any chance to ride with Team BO, happily joined. Goat rocked up at BObbie’s at 05h19 and chowed his food and crapped in his toilet, without flushing. The two then rocked up at Fournos at the request of the Panda by 06h15. As per protocol, no one was there. BObbie: (Blaming) Idiot. Goat: (Remorse) %$#@&*^#@(#)@#...

After the “Choke Job” at Argus, Team BO returned home angry (not the kids, they returned home drunk). Although they were told that about 30000 people would rather have their time, the team knew they didn’t achieve what they aimed for. Panda started training furiously, often times putting 200km on the clock in a day. BOpa spent his Expense Account on a Superbike (the proven race winner Specialized SL3). Lani ducked into BOwife’s arms for comfort. BObbie ate a lot more and the Goat still hasn’t shaved. Knowing this is not good for their psych, the team gathered and decided to go back to their root, the Stoneheaven 40km and slaughter some poor fun riders who still can’t ride on cleats for some soul searching. Not the Panda, he’s so angry he decided another 180km in the saddle was his soul searching. Not the Lani, he decided another BOwife’s hug was better than the Goat’s hairy arms. No matter, the Goat, BOpa, Pitt, BObbie and the Applicants decided they need this. (The Applicants are t...

On 11 April Team BO's sponsor held a Golf Day to thank Team BO's 1-2-3 performance at the weekend (Race Report to follow shortly). Photos of the event below. BObbie, Lani, Goat, Panda, Pitt, Le Train were all there. But they were busy at the 19th hole for some real golf and as you can see from the pics, you need some time. BOpa likes to pose but no real action. Oh wait, wait, Lani, Pitt and Goat were not there, not there...

As the thick and dark cloud rolls down Table Mountain, flashing with lightning and distant thunder, the Goat turned to look at BObbie. But before he could speak, a howling wind smacked a green mobile toilet with such force it tumbled the toilet over with the poor soul inside screaming with pain and sheer horror as the chemical and his litter splashed all over him, half naked, his bib tangled around his ankle. Goat: (Freaking out) Er… Bobbie: (Fake determination) NO!!! We ride!!! Famous last words... *     *     *     *     * BObbie woke up in a cold sweat. Although he put up a brave face, the signs have not been kind to him since the journey started. He has never been superstitious, but without a thought, he flipped through his iPhone and went through the good luck messages to get some comfort. Then he took a deep breath, wrapped himself up with BObaby 1’s diaper and headed into the lounge to prepare for the start. Downstairs, Lani is also awake...